Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize