so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
