I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize
