The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Randomize
