I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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