New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
