i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
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