Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
