He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Never joke about your clitoris.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
