Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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