is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize