marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
my liver is dry heaving
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
