dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
