He disabled his match.com account in front of me
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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