in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Randomize