i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
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