yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
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