I don't think brook has ever known best
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
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