we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Randomize