I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Naked. naked and bneed help.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Randomize
