Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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