Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Randomize
