you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
