absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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