This is your typical "sorry i got drunk and tried to seduce you into having sex while you were throwing up" text.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Success! We fucked roommates!
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
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