I cockslap morals
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
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