absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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