Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Randomize