I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Randomize
