I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize
