we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
