Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
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