no. you can't hotbox the world.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize
