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Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
I love having hate sex.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
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