I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
