porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
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