I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
