In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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