All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Randomize
