i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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