so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
The only dream I remember having is one where my dad's sperm turned into baby hippos. Like, tiny baby hippos, pocket-sized. I am so fucked up.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
