i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
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