Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Randomize