I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Randomize
