I want to stick my p in your. b.
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Randomize
