Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
Randomize
