I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Still dying that you shit outside
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Randomize