your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
