Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
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