idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
