I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
You can't special order awesome
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
